Every thought that goes through my head
I tear right out of its bed.
If it doesn’t stand with the Word of Life,
Then it sees nothing but my knife.
When feelings stand and shout their lies
There is a part of me I know that dies.
‘Til I tell them “you I see”
And “this is what I know to be.”
Because there is a truth that’s real
You can’t listen to what you feel.
Just fight to get on through
And cling to what you know is true.
I drive this road along a canyon
The miles tick away
Lost in a world so vast
It can be crossed in a day
Across the gap my goal I can see
Where I’ll be today
Forced on a path around
Through all the sights on the way
My eyes they see a prize worth taking
A place I long to stay
But I feel I’ll not be
Along this endless highway
With a lifeline I cling to
I stare out in longing
At the ever amazing ocean,
But cannot let go to swim
Out there all on my own.
Hold me up, keep me safe.
Hold me back, keep me still.
Why is this safety net
Made of razor wire?
Can I swim on my own
If I just let go?
Or will I drown,
My mind shut down?
There’s a joy when I know,
A bounce none can deny.
I can be all I see
Knowing what is behind me.
But then I’m hit with a lie
I tend to believe.
What I know feels wrong
And I question the song.
But through my tears
I see you kneel.
You take my palms
And quell my qualms.
With your truth comes a dawn.
Though I’m never without woe
I can stand and continue on.
Because I know,
Though my life may be gone,
Resurrection is Your show.
All my life I’ve been staring at this wall
And reading the writing, a story for the ages
Full of heartache and loss
With a villainous hero
Who plays the mentor and the fool.
I’ve read about a battle for change
With victory a concept
True only in lies
That left him broken and falling,
Devastated by the loss
Of who might have been.
And no story is true
Without a love that no one wants
And a demon that no one hates.
And where’s the fun
If the hero has friends
When he needs them most?
These words etched into stone
Tell of a possession
That started as a deal
And ended without a soul.
And of a prison that none can see
But through the words of a book in green.
There is a character who is not a monster
And another who doesn’t know her.
One who speaks but they don’t hear
And one that has his books and wisdom.
There is one who is trapped in a jar
And who wants a tattoo on his sleeve.
At the end is an ellipsis
That moves farther down with each passing day.
The longer I stay
The more this fiction is written on this wall.
A war between copper and tin
Shredding a statue of bronze
And leaving it wonderin’
If it is the sum or if it is the parts
Or if it is a being of a different skin.
It is frozen in place,
In the corner of a garden,
Its eyes fixed on a sacred base
And the angel of gold stood on its face
With every hand placed on her skin
The molecules of his within
Break apart, not how they’ve been,
Until he fears that he will melt
To a puddle, when it’s felt
Will leave a burning and a welt
On all who notice where he dwelt.
He pleads the sculptor of his life
To keep his shape set through his strife
And turn him from his golden queen
Or lift her eyes to be his wife
This is the second of the two poems I’ve written recently. Be sure to read the first here
The Monster That Controls Me
I am not the monster that controls me.
I am the defeated the world has not seen.
He whispers to me that I am steady
While ripping me apart before I’m ready.
He tells me I don’t need a team,
But doing this alone feels like a dream.
The smile on my face is a beast of its own,
I cannot control it, it sits on a throne.
Everything I say comes with the wrong tone,
What should be a shout instead is a groan.
I am the knight in shining armor
Who waits for his damsel, who doesn’t know her,
To save him from his dragons, who treat him unsure
And put him on down like a mad cur.
When will someone see
That a monster controls me?
There is a door, but I am without key.
When will someone come and let me be free?
This is first of two poems I’ve been working on over the last couple of days. Be sure to read the second here
I’m banging on the glass to catch your eye.
Or am I just curled up on the floor?
I beg for you to hear me cry.
Or am I just talking to the door?
Raging within, a storm and a fire,
Somehow a secret hidden by the liar.
Sick of who I’ve been before,
Why can’t I be the man asked for?
A man without fear,
A lover with heart so clear.
Of me, all I plead
Is to open my book for all to read.
How do I get my heart tattooed to my sleeve?
A million words inside do swarm
To come out their only form
Is a disguising drip, a uniform.
Can someone less alone
Show me how my top might be blown
And the words flood out like a cyclone?
Like a beast trapped and caged
I claw at the walls that I have built,
Defeated in this war I’ve waged,
Forever cursed to die and wilt.
Like a moth in a jar set by a light,
I can see what I want, but with all my might
I can never seem to win this fight.
The glass between I cannot break
For all I wish to take.
It’s right in front of me, all I long to save,
Instead I’ve just cuffed myself to the grave.
My struggle may forever last,
Smothered by the darkness I have cast.
Fear and doubt of the mask I play
Afraid of what I want to say.
Occupied, my heart waits for you to liberate.
Inside I’ve hidden my gold and jewels
That are yours if only you roll the stone away.
Break the ice of doubt and fear
And you my heart of warmth will seek to repay.
Through my fear I’ve surrendered tools,
Please take them up and extricate.
Somehow I keep finding myself writing poetry. Oh well, at least I’m not having to read it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If I could, I do pray,
I would take you back to yesterday
And show you I may
The girl that you did slay.
Instead I am harassed
Sitting here just killing the past.
I cannot take all that you took from me,
But I will take all that you see.
My love I so had,
In trust I was clad.
‘Twas victory your side held so firmly
Until you came and shattered me
Like your precious sanity.
With undefendable reason
You drew us both to treason,
Now we’re soldiers and we’re in season
So here is blood to sink your knees in.
Take my hand and do this dance,
Our ever changing stance.
The time is now
For you to bow
My love I so had,
In trust I was clad.
‘Twas victory your side held so firmly
Until you came and shattered me
Like your precious sanity.
By our side great beasts of fire
Fight and never tire
With flame and fury all do admire
Until the world smothers this great flier.
So with sword and claw
We tear this world and set our law.
By death alone may it be stopped
So step right up and take what’s not been dropped.
My love I so had.
In trust I was clad,
‘Twas victory your side held so firmly
Until you came and shattered me
Like your precious sanity.
Your life was forfeit
The moment you entered my life.
That blade you laid wherever it would fit
Granted me your world of strife,
The control you kept was merely feint.
A life you had so full and free
Until you came and shattered me
Like your precious sanity
Before I get the question: yes, this is from the point of view of a character. It is actually a sneak peek at the books I am working on.